Hard Times

See this photo?  This is part of our backyard.  My husband does a beautiful job. We have many raised beds that we have filled with vegetables.  The roses are special Fourth of July roses that we bought when we got married four years ago.  The incessant rain this year has been very difficult because I have been longing to spend the summer outside in our backyard. We got Noodlebug a sandbox and some other outdoor toys. We bought a dining set so we can eat outside. We dream of all the vegetables we will harvest this summer and fall.

All of that may be over.  My husband lost his job yesterday. We rent our house from his [former] boss and I don't know if he is going to kick us out. It is hard enough to worry about losing a job.  We were just making ends meet and I honestly don't know how we are going to pay our bills. What is so much worse is the prospect of losing our home. We moved into this house when we came home from our honeymoon. I brought Noodlebug to this house from the hospital. I always thought when we left this place it would be to move into a house of our own.  Now, I don't know what will happen to us.  The idea of losing our home and never getting to harvest all the vegetables that my husband so lovingly planted.  The thought of leaving Noodlebug's room that my husband painted a month before the baby was born. The thought of saying goodbye to our neighbors and the trees that we love to watch as we sit in the backyard. 

I can't bear it.

I know I need to "hand it over" to God. I know I need to have faith that we are going to be okay. We still have my job even though we lost 60% of our income yesterday. We are all on my health insurance so we still have that. But to be without our home is unbearable. It's just too much.  I'm scared and I'm heartbroken.

Please send prayer and good thoughts.